The model I think is fairly self explanatory.

A little 'social commentary' here, but I often watch the daily uploads of a fairly elderly gay man, youtube channel 'Kizzume'. It is interesting to observe a -real- person, a person like myself that refuses to wear a mask, but due to not pretending to be something he's not, and of not displaying a facade of a 'normal' person, he does often fall into traps where he's often wrong on issues, not always, but you can watch him grow and develop on basically a daily basis and reform his opinions and develop and refine himself.

It's interesting for me to see, a man grow and develop, even as old as he is.

I do often think and I've talked about it before, about how when I was a kid, I entirely thought Adults were supposed to be different, like, mature, stoic, indestructible.

Having long been an adult, I figure 'maturity', comes in various styles, mostly I suppose emotional maturity is one thing that's real, but adulthood isn't really what people make it out to be. You don't really stop being who you are for the most part, you don't really lose your sense of humor, adults find fart jokes funny too like kids do, and yeah, husbands and wives will flat out burst out laughing if one of them farts really loudly, even if people would consider that to be childish.

But like, you don't really lose that sense of childishness, you don't grow up to be dead inside, I think what a lot of people tend to do, and why they suffer so much, is that they aren't free to enjoy life, or to be happy. They're chained by what is presumed to be social expectations of what an adult is supposed to be, which is a lie hidden under a glass mask.

It's the emperor wearing no clothing, but he's made everyone else put on the imaginary clothing, and so now everyones afraid to point it out, because they're naked too and pretending for functionally no reason, but they're told to, so they do.

As an aside, to the moderators.

I apologize for my constant belligerence towards your moderation, I know that you guys treat me as lightly as you can, and that does still throw me into fits when I'm in a bad place emotionally, and it's generally just bad timing, it's not like you'd really know when I'm having a bad day, and I generally am fairly enjoyable to be around, but bad days and alcohol always seem to be the days that something triggers me into a sort of wrath mode, I'm working on the alcohol part of that, as well as spotting when I'm clearly unstable, which from a first person perspective can be very hard to notice, everyone in an insane asylum thinks everyone else is the crazy one.

I do know that you guys do have a rough time moderating this site, I do know of that one site that used to call itself under your same name but with the end url changed so that they could host models you've deleted for moderation purposes.

I've seen what you've seen, and I don't envy your position. You're akin to cops that have to basically browse and catalogue things that would give any normal person trauma unless they're completely crazy. Except kind of worse, because with a.i, psychopaths can get very.. creative.

I'll continue on working on myself and how I present my descriptions to be less worthy of editing, and I figure when I'm in a good place like now, it's when you guys do enjoy them. Sorry for the mishaps and stuff here and there, and the sort of banner mockery I've got going now. I'm not changing it for now, but I'll probably add additional mockery to it -within reason- as an emotional outlet for whenever I think you guys have done something that angers me, consider it an ongoing art project, as opposed to anything that would actually be bad, like ranting or crying like a baby about it.

I do know that you guys mean well and are doing your best. And I myself need to do better.

Please do not give any indication that you've read this, you guys always send signals in ways that I at first completely misinterpret as an attack. Sometimes when you hand a person a rose, they grasp it and think your handing them the thorns.

https://vocaroo.com/1dCKgpymuk1M

Back to my devilish tricks.

Works well at a strength of 1

Previews made with Anima Base Model 1.0